I never could see my life without him But there stood this broken trust
Shoving past all that I had come to know would only lead to regrets piled atop regrets – never again feeling safe
As great as this love was I knew me It would not end well So, I let it go in the most awful way Never to see, or speak to him for ever Time is not always the healer she purports to be Years later when we could again speak He asked. I explained. That was not about you, I said. That was about keeping that thread I was hanging by intact.
Pat R 6/22/21
Isn’t it pretty to think so. –The Sun Also Rises (1926). Ernest Hemingway
Over at dVerse we are to write a poem based on a chosen quote from Hemingways work. I chose the above.
Linking to dVerse Poets Pub where Lisa is hosting Poetics -“One true sentence” . To read other entries go here
“We were talking a while ago” , her eyes searched my face.
“About papa”, I said. She had asked me where he was. I said he wasn’t here just now.
“Yes”, she nodded. and smiled, her chain of thought had reconnected.
“I loved him so much” , she said. “He was always in my corner. He would fight for me”.
Those words had never crossed her lips before. At least, never in my presence.
“I’ve never heard you say that before”, I said. “You’ve only always talked about what a pain in the ass he was” I said, as those words left me, it felt like a reflex action.
“You both were a pain in the ass to each other”, I quickly interjected. as a correction. I am shocked to hear there was love there.
“He did tell me that he loved you” , she seemed as surprised to hear it, just as I was way back when he said it.
In all the years I’ve been on this earth, all I’ve ever seen between these two was fighting. At times, it felt like they were fighting to the death. In my young mind I wondered what would happen to me and my sisters and brother if one of them killed the other.
Now here she sits, in a confused state laced with moments of clarity, professing her love for my father who no longer among the living. I didn’t have the heart to tell her this earlier, today of all days. It was Fathers Day. And she was treading the waters of unfinished business.